Connecting people, empowering lives

A spate of recent suicides among students and the ongoing worry about this mind-numbing phenomenon is a cause of national concern. Over 100,000 Indians commit suicide every year, and the number has only risen over the past two decades, say experts. Worse, over 71% of suicides are by people below the age of 44. While suicides are attributed to acute mental agony, the trauma on those who are left behind is not less. Savita Narayan profiles a Pune-based NGO called Connecting… which helps people cope with the effect of suicide on the survivors

“We had forgotten to smile. The joy had gone out of our lives,” says Arnavaz Damania, a survivor affected by the suicide of a relative. The impact of the event made her realise the need for counselling not just for a survivor but also the larger circle of family and friends. “We felt lost and were just going from day to day, automatically doing our chores. I’ve always been a positive person and so I began to look for ways to improve the situation. I had to help even if it was the one family," says Ms. Damania.

She surfed the Internet, seeking people or institutions to approach. AFSP, the American Federation of Suicide Prevention, put her in touch with Dr Aruna Jha in Chicago who runs the Asian-American Suicide Prevention Initiative. Dr Jha conducted a seminar in Pune on awareness creation which led to the forming of a group.

India, China and Japan account for 30% of worldwide suicides according to the World Health Organisation—and the numbers are increasing yearly. Indian society has changed dramatically over the past decade. Increased pressure for good performance at students' exams, maintaining peak results at the workplace, loosening of family ties and lack of good interpersonal relationships are some reasons.

In 2005, Ms Damania set up Connecting... at Pune, with trained volunteers to offer counselling, suicide prevention and facilitation programmes to create awareness of coping strategies and healthy outlets for intense emotions such as anger and frustration. The entity also interacts with survivors and counsels families of suicide victims to manage the trauma.

A suicide attempt is the reaction of a person unable to cope with unbearable psychological pain. Before reaching this juncture, the person usually explores ways to make the pain more bearable but does not find a solution on his own. He lacks both inner resources to cope as well as a perspective on how to approach the problematic issue. Often, he undergoes long periods of suffering in isolation before giving indirect indications to near and dear that he's reached the end of his tether. Connecting... is a neutral point of contact for the suicidal; the help lines offer empathy that is usually unavailable to him. The initial contact is from the suicidal caller or a sympathetic well-wisher. Treatment is possible only when the initiative comes from him. Connecting... offers trained and skilful counselling, ensuring that the person, at the first instance, is calmed and that the immediate crisis of peak vulnerability is deflected. In subsequent contact sessions, through empathy and positive reinforcement, the caller realises on his own accord that life is worth living and that workable solutions to his problems can be found.

Support for survivors is also essential to prevent the recurrence of an attempt. Survivors usually harbour feelings of guilt. The stigma of societal judgement makes them opt for empathetic counselling on a one-on-one basis. Group sessions are useful for victims' families encouraging the sharing of experiences, of healing together to start the grieving process. The discussion is led by the facilitator.

Workshops are conducted for the police and hospital workers to modify their approach and improve interactions with victims, the affected families and survivors. Connecting... is actively engaged in sensitising the general public towards stress and interpersonal relationships. These programmes take place in schools, housing societies, corporate offices—any group of people who want healthier interactions in their daily lives. The sessions are very impactful and tailor-made, taking the form of role-playing and demonstrations. Music and Art therapy is also offered.

Connecting... has the immediate need to expand its existing helpline facility from 6 hours to 24 hours with more phone lines, trained counsellors and media exposure; setting up a media watchdog to monitor and ensure empathetic and factual reporting of suicides; the setting up of emergency cells in hospitals which sensitively handle incoming cases, the subsequent legal aspects and documentation.

Connecting... helps the suicidal and their families in and around Pune. There are still hundreds of others in India who need their reassuring touch. 

Registered under Section 80G of the Income Tax Act

Connecting Trust, Dastur Girls School, Moledina Road, Pune 411001
Phone: +91 20 26333044
Helpline: +91 9922001122 (2pm-8pm)
[email protected]

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    1 decade ago

    Savita it reminded me of the counseling Geeta did while she was a student in Delhi.A stress free house is what the kids need at the time of exams.There is no alternative in our exam system yet. Lets all focus on telling the kids exam is not end of aa in life
    Good article Savita,well researched one that too

    Keshi Dayalu

    1 decade ago

    I am surprised to find out that the suicide rate has gone up. It is up to near friends and relatives to see the major changes in behavior and attitude of a possible victim. I would look for the most obvious warning sign- not doing things that you normally are passionate about, such as taking a walk, reading, socializing, traveling, playing games, and even watching movies. All around the world,life in general has become very hard to cope with and we probably will see this trend continuing. My own observation is that each generation is under more stress than the previous one. It is true we are living longer, but the quality of life could be a lot better.

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