Volkswagen Polo: A hilarious test drive

Polo is being promoted with a clutch of television commercials, each highlighting the car’s road-worthiness, with a healthy dose of humour thrown in

At last, a car ad campaign that makes road sense. Usually all we are stuck with is those predictable shots of cars zooming across the city streets (and this needs to be banned!) and/or women fawning over macho car men (can’t be banned!). And sometimes, a list of technical features (most of which don’t get registered in a 30-second TV commercial).
German engineering is perfectly suited for India’s pathetic road conditions. This is all that Volkswagen promises for its hatchback, Polo. And it does that admirably well. This is a good marketing tack. So far, no auto giant has promised this to us, despite the fact that the one thing most of us worry about is this: “Oh, all this tech, the chicks and the razzmatazz is all very well, par yeh gaadi hamaare bakwaas roads par chalegi kya?” 

Polo is being promoted with a clutch of television commercials, each highlighting the car’s road-worthiness. And the good thing is they have tried to inject some humour in each advert to get rid of the boring road stories. One commercial features the chubby owner checking out the car's ground clearance level by placing an ostrich egg below the car, and then driving over it. The egg is left unharmed, but Mama Ostrich isn’t amused. In another ad, the same chap tests the ruggedness of the car, by taking on a rhinoceros. And yes, nothing happens to the car, but the man runs for his life. And it goes on. Basically the idea is that since the Volkswagen engineers have already tested the Polo in Indian conditions, their customers don’t need to carry out their own tests.
Good strategy, it makes sense. And a decent creative execution too. Indian consumers will buy into this. Sure, the production values of the commercials could have been superior (the rhino commercial in particular is pretty shoddily made) but this blemish can be overlooked. Hopefully, other auto makers will take the cue and tell us stories we want to hear. And not lay out cold catalogues and hot babes on the tube.
On last thing: I think the trickery of employing wide angle shots to film small cars needs to be banned, as it misleads the consumers on the car’s actual width. The car appears a lot spacier than it is in reality. The Polo commercials are guilty of this subterfuge, and so are those of other car makers, especially when it comes to the hatchbacks. Hope the usually laid-back ASCI (Advertising Standards Council of India) is reading in.




6 years ago

wana have a test drive of a new polo


6 years ago

Dear All,

Bad Indian roads is history. Now we have fairly good roads except some speed breakers when road passes through a town or village.

National UID: An Orwellian Odyssey

Cut to 2020. Is this how Big Brother is going to exploit the UID project?

The year is 2020. I walk down from my apartment at Domlur Layout, Bangalore to go for an evening's relaxation to the Metro Road (previously called M G Road). As I hail an auto rickshaw and pay the fare via my automated mobile cum payment card, I get a message on my mobile: "Thanks for using Balaji's Auto Service, the last time you travelled by auto was three days back, from Koramangala to your home in Domlur". I am bit puzzled as to how they know this, but I brush the thought away.

I get off at Metro Road and hang out at Cafe Matteo at the Metro station. Nice, cool air-conditioned (AC) cafe. Bangalore has become so hot—due to global warming I suppose—that an AC is a must. As I pay for my regular Americano coffee with skimmed milk by the side via my credit card, my mobile beeps—"Welcome; I see you have just arrived from Domlur; as per our records, the last time you had a similar coffee was a week back at a Jayanagar Coffee Day joint; and yes, while going back make sure you take an auto rickshaw outside Eva mall; our computerised time and traffic analysis shows that it is the fastest and cheapest way to go by auto to Domlur from Metro Road at this time of the day."

I am flabbergasted. How do they know all this? Things like, when I had a coffee last time. And it strikes me, partly due to my mind working overtime thanks to the just-imbibed caffeine. It must be DL—the "Documented Life" service.

A day back I received an SMS on my mobile asking whether I would like to be subscribed for a 30-day free trial for this service, and I had said yes out of curiosity.

Documented Life has a database of what everyone does. And there has been some noise that they infringe on peoples' privacy. To me, it seems like my freedom itself is taken away. Still, I think there must be a way out. I decide not to travel by auto anymore or use my credit card. But, as I start walking back to Domlur from Metro—the only way I think my freedom would be preserved is if I walk—I see that the six-lane elevated highway no more allows people to walk.

So, maybe a bus might be fine, I think. But as I pay the conductor of the BTS (Bangalore Transport Service) bus via the special pass that BTS gives, I see a similar message on my mobile: "The last time you went back by bus to your house was a month back and you celebrated your bus travel by having a beer in Lakshmi Bar and Restaurant (LBR) at Domlur. How about doing that again today? We have specials for you."

"Riding on the UID database" said the footnote.

Aha! It all comes back to me now. I am convinced that the culprit for this loss of freedom and privacy is the unique identification (UID) project. The high-profile National UID project, which went on from 2009 to 2015 gave a unique ID to every resident in India.  The National UID Authority was established. It was claimed that it was particularly careful about privacy implications of the project.

The UID database for instance was carefully chosen, and one could only query if a particular UID corresponding to a particular fingerprint was valid or not. Owing to privacy concerns, you couldn’t do anything else with the database. To begin with, no one other than the UID Authority could even create a database with a UID as one of the elements.

But as time passed, due to one reason or the other, all these protections fell through.

First of all, even though the UID was not mandatory for everyone, slowly as banks and other institutes started making UID mandatory for their service, it became necessary for everyone, at least in cities, to have the UID by default. {break}

Without the UID, one could not get into an auto rickshaw as payment cards were linked to the UID, one couldn’t own a mobile as mobiles were linked to the UID or one could not have credit cards or bank accounts as they were also linked to the UID.

So, the first protection against privacy violation—not to make UID compulsory—fell through this way.

Secondly, as the threat of terrorism started growing, linking information became a critical necessity. NATGRID, a home ministry project meant to tackle terrorism by co-relating various important databases was the first one to use the UID to link information across disparate databases. Also, it became necessary for banks and mobile companies to keep UID-related data.

Thirdly, as each financial institution had issued their service against a UID, they did have a UID-service mapping, so given a UID, they could map it to say their credit card in case of a credit card company, and the credit card could be further linked to the transactions.

Documented Life did the next thing that was logical. It paid companies and bought their databases of this mapping, and once it had a threshold of a number of companies participating, they could literally track everything that a person did. Not that before the UID days the above was not possible. Even before the UID days, mobile companies could track where you are at any moment by tracking your mobile location. But at least the certainty and genuineness of the data wasn’t there. One could always use a mobile, which was in a friend's name and put the trackers off. What the UID did was that it gave the stamp of certainty to the whole data, and that was the game changer. For instance, Documented Life has recently announced a deal with the Income Tax (I-T) authorities; one will not have to file I-T forms anymore; I-T would get automatically deducted from one's bank account as all income and all expenses can now be auto-tracked thanks to Documented Life's database.

Isn’t this exactly the 1984 scenario that Orwell predicted, albeit one that has come about a bit later? It also struck me why most of the Western countries shelved or limited their national UID projects. Sure, the Indian National UID authority had good intentions for the UID project. They claimed that government schemes would reach the poor as the poor have problems proving their identity. UID turned out to be a boon to the poor, but a bane to freedom.

But I am not the type who would give in so easily. I think there should be some way out to beat the system and regain my privacy.

I come home, and call my friend M. He always has brilliant ideas to solve any problem. I tell him, "We are losing our freedom and privacy; this is what happened; when I paid for the bus ticket, they said the last time when I travelled by bus I had a beer in such and such place, and they said you should do it now, and there are specials. Isn’t this an invasion on my freedom and privacy?"

"Samir," says M, "I know very well you are going to have a beer. They are in fact making it convenient for you by reminding you beforehand and offering you specials."

As I walk into LBR and sip the chilled beer, I am confused. Have I lost my freedom or have I gained convenience?  I ponder for some time. But, slowly clarity dawns on me. "Would it be any different if they had inserted a chip in my body?"

(Dr Samir Kelekar is founder-director of Teknotrends Software, Bengaluru)




6 years ago

I am fully convinced with your opinion of threat to National security and sovereignty. I request you to go through this article to understand the full scope of this UID Concept which is being imposed on us. Its official Invasion of Our Fundamental Right “Right to Privacy” by Multinational Giant Corporations.
Big Brother: Spying on Americans, The Threat of Satellite Surveillance
by John Flemming

Covert Operations of the U.S. National Security Agency

A lawsuit filed against the U.S. National Security Agency reveals a frightening array of technologies and programs designed to keep tabs on individuals.
From an article in Nexus Magazine April/May 96

John St Clair Akwei
National Security Agency
Ft George G. Meade, MD, USA
(Civil Action 92-0449)
The following document comprises evidence for a lawsuit filed at the U.S. Courthouse in Washington, DC, by John St Clair Akwei against the National Security Agency, Ft George G. Meade, Maryland (Civil Action 92-0449), constitutes his knowledge of the NSA's structure, national security activities proprietary technologies and covert operations to monitor individual citizens Ed.


The potential of Microchips is very scary for "Freedom" and Human Rights to exist. That seems to be the Goal all these BIOMETRIC exercises being conducted everywhere. "LET US NOT ALLOW THISTO SUCCEED"
Bio-electromagnetic Weapons
A weapon system that operates at the speed of light, that can kill, torture, enslave and escape detection. Harlan Girard

Microchip Implants, Mind Control, and Cybernetics
This article was originally published in the 36th-year edition of the Finnish-language journal SPEKULA (3rd Quarter, 1999). SPEKULA (circulation 6500) is a publication of Northern Finland medical students and doctors of Oulu University OLK (Oulun Laaketieteellinen Kilta). It is mailed to all medical students of Finland and all Northern Finland medical doctors. The author, Rauni-Leena Luukanen-Kilde, MD is the former Chief Medical Officer of Finland

From The Article “ ……….. Thirty years ago brain implants showed up in X-rays the size of one centimeter. Subsequent implants shrunk to the size of a grain of rice. They were made of silicon, later still of gallium arsenide. Today they are small enough to be inserted into the neck or back, and also intravenously in different parts of the body during surgical operations, with or without the consent of the subject. It is now almost impossible to detect or remove them.
It is technically possible for every newborn to be injected with a microchip, which could then function to identify the person for the rest of his or her life. Such plans are secretly being discussed in the U.S. without any public airing of the privacy issues involved. …
…Today's microchips operate by means of low-frequency radio waves that target them. With the help of satellites, the implanted person can be tracked anywhere on the globe…
….electronic surveillance system can simultaneously follow and handle millions of people. Each of us has a unique bioelectrical resonance frequency in the brain, just as we have unique fingerprints. With electromagnetic frequency (EMF) brain stimulation fully coded, pulsating electromagnetic signals can be sent to the brain, causing the desired voice and visual effects to be experienced by the target. This is a form of electronic warfare. U.S. astronauts were implanted before they were sent into space so their thoughts could be followed and all their emotions could be registered 24 hours a day…..”

Saurabh Nanda

6 years ago

"UID turned out to be a boon to the poor, but a bane to freedom."

The sad part is, no one is really sure how the poor are going to exactly get benefited by this UID. Everything is just hand-waving and shoving the details for later.

K B Patil

6 years ago

A spine chilling scenario. To enhance the effect, let me add more spice. Suppose, one fine day, someone who is a disciple of our dear Madhu Koda or Shibu Soren, becomes the PM of this blessed land, the first meeting he will call will be that of the IT department. He will set a stiff '"collection" target and let them loose on the citizens. I will leave it to others to complete the story.

Profits of non-financial services firms likely to rise 22% in FY10-11: CMIE

Shipping, software and hotel industries will benefit from the improvement in the global economy and this will lead to these sectors posting robust growth of 18%, 39.6% and 30.8% in sales, respectively, according to CMIE’s latest forecast

On the back of the global economic and an expected quantum jump in the sales of the shipping, software and hotel industry, non-financial services are likely to clock around 22% growth in their net profits for FY10-11, economic think-tank Centre for Monitoring Indian Economy (CMIE) said, reports PTI.

Alongside, profit after tax (PAT) margins are also expected to surge by 0.50%, it said.

"We expect the growth in net profits of the non-financial services sector to accelerate to 21.9% in 2010-11 from the 8.7% estimated in 2009-10," CMIE said in its recent forecast on the domestic economy.

The growth would be driven by a 16.5% rise in sales, it said, adding the PAT margins too would expand by 0.50%.

CMIE said that shipping, software and hotel industries would benefit from the improvement in the global economy and this would lead to these sectors posting a robust growth of 18%, 39.6% and 30.8% in sales, respectively.
The aviation sector, which was hit hard by the global meltdown, may also see a rise in sales along with the transport logistics sector due to the improvement in domestic, industrial and trading climate, the CMIE said.

"We also expect sales of liquefied petroleum gas (LNG) storage and distribution sector to rise by a handsome 27.8% because of the transmission of additional gas coming from Reliance Industries' (RIL) KG basin," it said.

At the same time, PAT of the hotel sector will rise by 72.2% and that of the shipping sector by 122% after falling in the last fiscal, the think-tank said.

The transport services and LNG storage and distribution sectors' PAT would rise by around 15% whereas the software sector is likely to clock a 25% growth in PAT, CMIE said.


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