Leisure, Lifestyle & Wellness
Childhood misbehaviour finally understood, but too late for me (The Funny Side)
Someone showed me a somewhat random video in which people put cucumbers near cats and the horrified cats leapt away in sheer terror, sometimes leaping out of windows. Watching it, I re-lived my teenage attempts at dating. Cucumbers: I feel your pain.
 
Your columnist was further thrown back to childhood days by an Indian newspaper report that police officers are using catapults to fire balls of chili powder as a crowd control technique. Well I did the exact same thing as a kid and my teacher denounced me as a troublesome brat who would achieve nothing in life. Okay, so her prediction was accurate, but I should still get royalties, right?
 
I was feeling stung about that when a reader sent in a news item about a guy in France who is suing his boss for boring him. He claims that the four years he spent at one company were so stupefyingly dull that they caused him physical harm, damaging his joints and brain. My high school history teacher, Mr. Mohan, was so boring that you could actually feel your brain fossilising during the class. Once he scheduled a history double-period and not even the brainy kids turned up, knowing he would induce comas and then brain-death.
 
Yet it is only now, finally, that society is seeing childhood episodes as things to take seriously. Following the success of The Anger Room in Texas, several countries offer "tantrum spaces" where adults can scream and shout and smash up stuff. They quote psychologists as saying that destroying property is "a vital outlet for emotional release blah blah blah".
 
Well thank you very much, world, for realising this decades after I spent my childhood being punished. At last, modern kids have the terminology to argue their case. Teacher: You just burned down the school. Kid: Destruction is a vital outlet for emotional release blah blah blah. Teacher: Good point -- here, take this gold merit star.
 
Readers may have seen the US news item about an incident in Colorado when police used pepper-spray to subdue an out-of-control kid aged eight. Some people said they should have just reasoned with him, but that only makes sense to people who've never had to deal with eight-year-olds. Pepper-spray is the minimum force necessary. A preferable option would be to approach the kid with a bomb disposal robot fitted with a speaker. "Put down the axe and we will send an adult in a hazmat suit to read a Winnie-the-Pooh book to you."
 
I reckon Asian boys grow up with the trickiest challenges these days. In China, the folk tradition called Fu-Ji requires children to use a Chinese ouija-board to summon a female evil spirit. But Chinese law says males have to wait until they are at least 22 to get married. So it's fine for a boy to call up a demonic she-devil, but marrying an actual physical woman -- whoah, guys, this might be dangerous, let's wait at least 10 more years. (Not sure if that is bizarre or actually very smart.)
 
Whatever. Now excuse me while I go dig up my catapult. My kids are running amok and I need to do some crowd control.
 
Disclaimer: Information, facts or opinions expressed in this news article are presented as sourced from IANS and do not reflect views of Moneylife and hence Moneylife is not responsible or liable for the same. As a source and news provider, IANS is responsible for accuracy, completeness, suitability and validity of any information in this article.
 

 

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Modi pips Big B, becomes most followed Indian on Twitter
Prime Minister Narendra Modi became the most followed Indian on micro-blogging site Twitter with 22.1 million followers when he surpassed Bollywood actor Amitabh Bachchan who has 22 million followers, as on Thursday evening.
 
Modi, who joined Twitter in 2009, gained followers at a consistence pace of almost two million followers every month during 2015. In doing so, he left behind the Khans of Bollywood as well. 
 
The three Khans of Bollywood -- Shah Rukh, Salman and Aamir -- are trailing behind Modi respectively with 20.9 million, 19.1 million and 18.3 million followers. 
 
Earlier, Modi overtook Shah Rukh Khan in January this year in terms of number of followers. Shah Rukh is now the third most followed celebrity online. 
 
The tech-savvy Prime Minister has been known to emphasise the use of online platform to publicise his campaigns. The word about campaigns like 'Make In India', 'Swachh Bharat' and 'Mann Ki Baat' were fervently spread through the use of Twitter.
 
Disclaimer: Information, facts or opinions expressed in this news article are presented as sourced from IANS and do not reflect views of Moneylife and hence Moneylife is not responsible or liable for the same. As a source and news provider, IANS is responsible for accuracy, completeness, suitability and validity of any information in this article.
 

 

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'The Australian' uploads fresh set of documents on Scorpene
A new set of leaked documents on India's Scorpene submarines was published by Australian newspaper "The Australian" on Thursday revealing functional description, including the cylindrical and flank array, sonar interception and a number of other details on the boat.
 
The document, with "Restricted Scorpene India" written on it, has a System Technical Manual and an Operating Instruction Manual that have crucial details of the combat management system.
 
While the vital parameters and exact details have been redacted or blacked out, the original documents contain all data.
 
These details may be put together and make detecting the submarine easier.
 
The document even gives out the frequency band of the Sonar intercept receiver, distributed array, active array.
 
Indian Navy has so far maintained that the details would not reveal the final submarine's signature, as the specifications in the document are generic and each boat has a unique signature that is known only when it is ready and in the waters.
 
The total leaked documents run over 22,000 pages.
 
The first set of documents uploaded by "The Australian", included technical manuals of the boat, as also details like its acoustic signature and levels of noise radiation.
 
Tracking a submarine involves sophisticated sonar equipment that can detect, classify, locate and track a vessel based on echoes from its hull and the noise it generates.
 
Hull reflection, radio and radar signals and water pressure can also give away a submarine's location.
 
To this extent, the Scorpene's stealth characteristic is its biggest strength. This has been achieved by modifying its hull and reducing its noise footprint.
 
Disclaimer: Information, facts or opinions expressed in this news article are presented as sourced from IANS and do not reflect views of Moneylife and hence Moneylife is not responsible or liable for the same. As a source and news provider, IANS is responsible for accuracy, completeness, suitability and validity of any information in this article.
 

 

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